Saturday, September 3, 2011

Coming Out of My Shell

I’m shy as fuck. I know...its REALLY hard to believe that a guy like me can be so shy, but I am. I’m so shy its scary. I’ve always been this way...ever since I was a little gay boy trying to navigate my way through this big gay world. I have to be drunk to approach another dude at the club. Ok maybe not drunk...but tipsy. I don’t like rejection, so I just stay to myself. Unless I got liquor in my system...then I really don’t give a fuck. Yeah...that’s stupid. By refusing to step out of my comfort zone I’m missing out on a lotta things. I mean who knows, Bow Wow might be tryna hit me up, but I’m gonna miss out because I’m all shy and shyt. Then again, he has that “baby” (I wanna see a paternity test, remind me to call Maury) so that’s probably not gonna happen. But that’s not the point. I’m too old to be this damn shy...and I’m cute as hell with a decent lil body (I’m workin on it, even though I haven’t been to the gym in 3 weeks. Don’t judge me) so I shouldn’t have any problems. Niggas should be flocking in my direction...they should be on my dick like a fat hoe on a Whopper. On my ass like Eddie Long at a high school freshmen orientation. Ok, maybe that was a bit much. 
This is part of a deeper issue. I think many of us GAYS have self esteem issues, whether we wanna admit it or not. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think I’m ugly by ANY means, and you wouldn’t either if you ever saw me (I promise I’m not conceited). But everyone thinks they have a flaw that stands out whenever they are in a crowd. Maybe they think they are too skinny...or too fat...or they don’t have enough booty...or whatever. We always see other men that seem to get whatever they want in this lifestlyle, and that makes us step back. Makes us feel slightly inadequate. Emphasis on the word SLIGHTLY. 
But it really shouldn’t matter. Life is about seeing what you want and going after it, no matter what it takes. Don’t worry about the consequences...just go for it. Just do it...just make it happen. And if a bitch don’t like it they can suck my dangalang. 
Ugh...I’m starting to ramble and I forgot my original point. Something about being shy...seriously though I gotta step out of the box. Fuck what someone else thinks....
*raises glass*
Cheers to all the shy niggas! We will eventually overcome that nonsense and run the world. 


  1. We all don't like rejection. Hell, I hate it. At this point, I should be used to it but I'm not. But it happens. You have to make the effort to open up and be outgoing. It takes time but once you set yourself to start coming out of your shell, you'll feel free. It's so much better being yourself and not giving a fuck about what other people think. I mean, I'm still trying to find my place in this "gay world" after being out for the last year. It's not easy but you'll overcome it.

    Once you do, all the boys are going to notice and start hunting you down. Be careful because it's some wild rabid animals out there.

  2. Hmph...I've seen the wild rabid animals already lol