Sunday, November 29, 2009

Poison, pt. 5


So the bitch had her baby prematurely...and the little mutha fucka looks NOTHING like me. He's two shades darker than me, his eyes are too close together, and his nose is a little bit too big. I don't wanna call the little mutha fucka UGLY, because that would be rude. But he CERTAINLY aint mine!
I called Ronnie


"Damn...why can't you answer the phone like a regular person?"

"My bad Paul...what's up?"

"I  just left the hospital. I saw the little mutha fucka"


"He's a ugly ass child. He aint mine...I know he aint mine."

There was a long pause.

"Yo, you there?"

"Yeah I'm here. So what you gonna do?"

"I don't know...but I gotta go."


My phone rang...ROXANNE.

"The baby needs blood."


"The baby needs blood! I'm too weak. You need to come down here and give some blood to the baby. You are his father!"

I hung up in her face. Was she serious? What does he need blood for? I drove back to the hospital and spoke to the nurse. She said that the baby was in critical condition and needed a blood transfusion, but that I wasn't an eligible donor. She said that our blood types didn't match. This confirmed my suspicions. I wasn't the father. I walked into Roxanne's room.

"BITCH! You lied to me!"

"So. What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing! I'm outta here!"

"No you're not! I know about you and Q! I've known about your faggot ass for years! That's why I met up with you at the party that night. You are going to take care of the baby and me!"

"No the fuck I'm not!"

"Yes you are, or I'll reveal your little secret to the world."

I paused. The bitch had me by the balls...I had a decision to make. I could either sell out and take care of this bitch and her bastard child or risk my reputation. 

"The baby's REAL father is on his way to the hospital. I know you will make the right decision!"

I sat in the waiting room and waited for Roxanne's "baby-daddy" to show up. I contemplated how I would approach this dude. Should I beat his ass? Or should I have a civilized conversation with him. I saw Ronnie approaching me with a paralyzed look on his face. A terrible thought hit me. Was Ronnie the father? Was my best friend the father of this child? I confronted him...

"What the fuck is this?"

"I'm sorry"

It took four people to get me off of him and he ended up with a bruised face and a few cracked ribs. I was betrayed by my best friend...he was like a brother to me. But I learned a valuable lesson...never trust ANYONE, especially a BITCH named Roxanne.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Poison, pt. 4

"Wuz good"

We shook hands and nodded as if this was our first encounter. We pretended that I wasn't fucking the shit out of him less than 24 hours ago. We pretended that he wasn't coming to my house after this little dinner party.

"So what's this all about?" I asked

"I told you I wanted you to meet somebody. My cousin is graduating soon and he wants to enter the draft. He needs an agent..."


Something about this didn't seem right...Something told me to be careful. I ordered another Corona as I contemplated my next move. I replayed the events of the night before as the alcohol took its effect. We ordered our food and finished the date without much excitement. We went our separate ways and I got a text 10 minutes later.

"We still on for tonite?"...-Q

Hmm...what should I do? Fucking Roxanne's cousin was definitely a 'no-no' but the man was sexy and he had that GOOD. I told him to meet me in an hour. I got home, freshened up, and waited for my guest to arrive. I slipped on a pair of black silk boxers, white basketball shorts, and a fresh white muscle shirt. The doorbell rang about 45 minutes later.


What the fuck is she doing here? I nearly froze.

"Are you ok?" she asked.

"What are you doing here?"

She walked past me into the living room and sat on the couch.

"I just thought we should talk about what happened earlier."


"The wine...Quinton...everything was a disaster. I'm scared and I need you."

This bitch was running game. Did she think I was stupid?

"Paul, I love you"

I didn't know what to think. I definitely didn't love this bitch...I thought she was crazy. But she was the alleged mother of my child, so I had to respect her. I looked at my cell phone.

'Be there in 5'

Quinton was on his way.

"Roxanne, can we talk about this later? I'm a little tired..."

"Let me give you a massage"

"Uhhh, no that's ok. Really...I'm just gonna go to sleep."

I sent Q a text telling him I needed 10 more minutes. He said he would drive around for a little longer. I tried harder to get rid of Roxanne. She left 5 minutes later. Quinton pulled up shortly after her car left the driveway. I invited him inside and he gave me a hug and a warm kiss on the lips. He grabbed my waist and started running his fingers up and down my back. We moved to the couch and he started kissing on my neck and nibbling on my ear. He reached into my shorts and grabbed my erection. He started stroking as I laid my head back and closed my eyes. I felt his lips touch the head. He messaged it with his tongue before putting the whole thing in his mouth.

Dude was a FREAK and I was getting turned on...we continued the foreplay, then went upstairs and fucked. We started out on the bed missionary style, and ended up on the floor doggystyle. We fell asleep in each others arms...

Monday, November 16, 2009

Poison, pt. 3

I woke up the next morning in my bed, naked.


The last thing I remember is banging Ronnie and Quinton before passing out on the couch. My phone beeped...text message.

"We need to talk...Roxanne"

Fuck that bitch...I hopped in the shower.

Another text message:

"When can we meet again???...Quinton"

Hmm...I was trying to leave that lifestyle alone. I had no desire to be with men, but last night with  Quinton and Ronnie had my mind wandering. Should I ignore his message? Or should I invite him over for another round? I like option 2. I told him to come over later that evening.

As I got dressed for work I started thinking about Roxanne. There was no way that baby was mine! I was definitely going to take a paternity test when the baby was born. I decided to be cordial and meet Roxanne for dinner.


I arrived at the restaurant around 5:30 and got a table. She was running late...figures. She arrived about ten minutes later, wearing a tight green dress and some black stilettos.

"Damn, you look good"

"I know...I have someone I want you to meet."


"You'll see"

Our waiter interrupted the conversation

"Can I get you started with something to drink?"

"I'll have a Corona," I said

"I'll have a glass of wine" she said.

"I thought you were pregnant?"

She got quiet...then decided to get water instead.

"What the fuck Roxanne? Wine?"

"I'm sorry...I just...I don't know"

I didn't know what to think about this situation. I was about to get up and walk away when her guest arrived.

"Paul, this is my cousin Quinton. He plays for UCLA and he should be going pro..."

What the fuck?

I was just smashing his BRAINS out last night...I ordered another Corona because I could tell that this would be a long night.

We shook each others hand and pretended that this was our first time meeting each other.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

5 Years in the Making, pt. 2


We started making out on the couch. His lips were soft and sweet...and I had been waiting on this moment for five years...waiting to caress his body. Waiting to lay him down and kiss every inch of his chocolate frame. I stopped and stared at him. He was sexy and intelligent...definitely wifey material. He looked up at me.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing baby"

I kissed his neck and nibbled on his ear. I could hear him moan and I could tell that he was ready. I pulled down his pants and put my finger inside his boxer briefs. He started grinding on me and getting into the moment.

"Wait...I can't." he said as he stopped and sat up.

"What? What's wrong?"

"I can't do this...I just can't do it. Can you take me home?"

Was he serious? I couldn't believe dick was hard as a brick and he was about to leave without performing his 'duties'. I was about to make his ass catch the bus.

"I'm sorry. I'm just not ready" he said

"Whatever" I pushed him to the side and picked up my basketball shorts. I put on a t-shirt and grabbed my keys. The ride back to campus was silent. He apologized when he got out of the car and said he would call me later. I didn't say anything asI drove off. On the way home I thought about him and the games he played. This was another round of his Olympics. I had been dealing with this shit for five years. At first it was little childish games, like not calling for a few days, but we're supposed to be on a higher level. He's playing with my dick now. It would be cool if he didn't purposely turn me on, but he knows what he did and that wack ass apology wasn't worth shit.

When I got home I got a picture message from him...a picture of his ass...wet and tight.

I guess the games were gonna continue...

Poison, pt. 2

"I'm pregnant"

I almost dropped the phone. How could she be pregnant? She had to be lying...she couldn't be pregnant. And if she was, there's no way that the baby is mine. I told her I would call her back later that evening. I was at work and had too much to deal with. I called my boy Ronnie.


"Bro...she's pregnant."

"What? Who?"


"Didn't you wrap it up? What were you thinking???"

"Hell yeah! I aint stupid!"

He got quiet

"You still there?"

"Aww man that's a sneaky bitch...a sneaky bitch"

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You never heard about the turkey baster trick?" he asked.

I heard about it, but I didn't think it was true. He told me about the scheme and I got ANGRY.

"Calm down bro...she might be a hoe. She might be sleeping around. It's probably not yours." he tried to console me

"You know what, you're right." I hung up the phone and we agreed to meet up at my house later to watch the game. I couldn't believe this! I definitely wasn't ready for kids. That's a huge responsibility. Roxanne must have had something up her sleeve. It seemed like she was eyeing me at Ronnie's she was hunting me. I pushed the thought out of my head and assumed that this was a coincidence. I was definitely gonna take a paternity test when the baby was born. I wasn't about to be stuck taking care of somebody else's snotty nosed kid for 18 years, BELIEVE THAT!

Later that night Ronnie knocked on my door. It was time for GAME NIGHT.

"I hope you don't mind...I brought a friend"

"Nah it's cool."

Ronnie's friend was a 6'1 college basketball star named Quinton. We went into the entertainment room and I brought everyone drinks. Ronnie and I had CORONA'S and Troy drank vodka/redbull. We started getting into the game, yelling at the refs calls, and cursing our team when they fucked up.

As I drank my third corona, I thought deeply about my current situation. I thought about the bitch named Roxanne. I thought about how she was a lying, conniving, deceitful woman. I thought about how all the women in my life were the same way. My mother didn't care about me and all of the women that I came into contact with were gold diggers. I thought Roxanne was different. She seemed like a LADY. But obviously I was wrong. It was apparent that I couldn't trust women.

I started on my fourth corona and I could definitely feel the effects of the alcohol. The room became blurry and the light was starting to hurt my eyes. I got up and turned it off.

"What the fuck you doin bro?" Ronnie asked.

"Fuck you!" I laughed as I threw a pillow at him. The alcohol was definitely getting to me. I was getting unwanted effect of the liquor. As halftime approached, I laid across the couch and closed my eyes, hoping this rock hard monster would go away.

I cracked my eyes when I felt something warm and wet sliding on my dick.


When I fully opened my eyes I saw Quinton bobbing his head up and down and Ronnie was behind him with his tongue in his ass. What was this? Was I being set up? At that moment I didn't care. I laid back and enjoyed the pleasure I was receiving from Quinton. He was a pro...bobbing and slurping. Ronnie and I messed around ONCE in college, but that was it. I left men alone after that and I never had a desire to try it again, but Quinton was definitely hitting that SPOT. I saw Ronnie pull out a condom, lube ol boy up, and go to WORK! He was tearing it up from the back while he slurped on my dick. After about ten minutes of constant pounding, Ronnie came all over Quinton's back and ass. I decided I wanted a piece, so I pulled out of his mouth, got behind him, and beat it up until I exploded. I passed out on the couch as the third quarter of the game started.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Confessions of a Jealous Boyfriend

I thought I would tell this many people are in similar situations name is __________ and I'm a jealous boyfriend.

My boyfriend can't have any friends
He can only leave the house if I know where he's going and when he'll be back
He can only go partying if he's with me
I get mad if someone looks at him with interest
I get mad if he sends a text or answers the phone in my presence

I tell him that I want him to be happy, but I won't let him interact with other people.
I tell him that I don't care about other people in his life, but I can't seem to trust him.

He's not a bad person.
He's never cheated
He's never been unfaithful
But I can't seem to trust him.

Is it me?
Is there something wrong with me?

Is it him?

My name is __________ and I'm a jealous boyfriend.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009


Life is a BITCH and her name is Roxanne. She took me to the lowest point of my life and I’m still trying to recover from all of the shit that the bitch put me through. 

I’ll start from the beginning

My name is Paul. I’m a 26 year old entertainment lawyer...born and raised in LOS ANGELES with my own small firm. I wouldn’t call myself RICH, but I’m DEFINITELY not broke. I’m a focused and driven individual, but I have a weakness. I can’t resist the ladies. I’ve had pussy thrown at me since middle school, and I’ve taken advantage of it ever since. I prefer the honey-caramel chicks because they compliment my chocolate skin very well. And I like short girls because they look better next to my 6’1 frame. 

You could call me a hoe. I have a different woman in my bed every night. I have an addiction and I can’t seem to overcome it...but its a SEX addiction. Is that a problem? I don’t think so...I lost my virginity when I was 12. The girl was 16. I haven’t been able to stop fucking since then. There’s something about driving a woman to the highest point of ecstasy that gets me call it what you want.

Would you call me a hoe? Hoe is a harsh word...I like sex and I know what pleases the body. I have a thick 11 inch PIPE, and I know how to work it. If you got a gift, then you should use it...right? Right!

I met Roxanne at a birthday party for my best friend Ronnie. I noticed that there was something different about this lady as I approached her at the bar. She wasn’t like the other thirsty chicks that I usually meet. She even offered to buy me a drink. We introduced ourselves, had a few drinks, and about an hour later she was screaming my name in my bed at my condo.

I move QUICKLY. Usually I tell hoes to leave after I get the draws, but this one was different.

“So what do you do?” I asked, trying to spark a little convo.

“I own my own sports management company”

Damn...bitch had a little money. She might be wifey material...

The next day I went to work with a HUGE smile on my face. Roxanne and I went at it three more times that night. She believed that it was her duty to make a hard dick soft...and she was a pro at it. Her sex game was on point, but there was something dark and cold about her. I was about to be tangled in her web, and nothing would be able to set me free.