Thursday, July 30, 2009

The Magic Cure

SO I was telling my coworker about this BITCH that works in my apartment complex. I don't like the BITCH because she's rude and she always has an attitude. So I was telling my coworker that maybe if the BITCH got some dick she wouldn't be such a DAMN BITCH all the time, but my coworker said that DICK isn't the cure for everything. I said GOOD DICK is the cure for everything.

So here's my question for the ladies (and power bottoms...hahaha). Does dick make you feel better? Does it brighten your day? Does it put you in a good mood? And how often do you need a 'fix'?

And I would like to say to the BITCH that works at my apartment complex that she needs some dick badly. So BITCH please do whatever you need to do to get it. Maybe you can look up DICK in the phone book and see what comes up. Actually people don't use phone books anymore, so you can go to yellowpages.com. Or craigslist...yes they have dick on craigslist. And if that doesn't work (because I honestly don't think anyone would want to FUCK this BITCH) you can visit the sex store (Zone d'Erotica) located by The Galleria and buy a vibrator. Bitch...

Photo Shoot: June 20 (I KNOW it's late...)

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Kids These Days...

So I spent the day with my sister today! I picked her up at 11 and we went running (the heffa made me run TWO DAMN MILES!). After that I took her back to my parents house so she could shower and change...then I went to MY house so I could shower and change. Then I took her to see my house and after that we went to Popeyes
(yall know that 2pc for 99 cents be POPPIN!) <---Totally BAD Grammar

Anyway, my sister was telling me about some of her friends, and I was like DAMN are you serious? I don't wanna just blast anybody, so I'm not gonna name names...but basically her best friend is in a situation where she has to choose between two guys. She 'loves' them both but she can't decide who she wants to be with.

Here's my thing: like I'm all about teenage love affairs and what not but I just don't think that these high school kids know what they are dealing with. Love is a bitch and TRUE love will fuck you up! In high school I wasn't focusing on girls (or boys!) I was a bit of a nerd, so my head was in the books. But don't get it twisted...I wasn't your typical nerd. I had a little girlfriend my senior year...and we thought we loved each other but I broke her heart like it was nothin. She even called my mama cryin (I kinda feel bad about it now but I didn't really care back then because I was a horny teenager/college kid and I wanted to participate in the all you can eat ass/dick buffet).

So this message is for the kids: keep your innocence. Do be in a rush to grow up...you may THINK that love and sex feels good but TRUST me its overrated. OK well sex feels good but it's still overrated so hold out for as long as you can. And if you think you might be gay...WELL you are in for a long and bumpy ride. Hehehe jus joking! (Or am I?????)

Just Say OK

I'm not good at communicating. It's the reason most of my relationships failed. In fact it's the primary reason I hate my job. If I was a good communicator I would be able to effectively and politely tell the customers to FUCK OFF, but instead I keep these feelings inside. But anyway, for those of you that don't know, I will be moving into a brand new house next Tuesday. This is MY SHIT...it has four walls, three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a laundry room,a kitchen, and a garage (but no garage door opener. Aint that some bullshit???). Me and my significant other have been shopping for the essentials...furniture, dishes, a flat screen TV...the basics. AND I already set up the cable and electricity. So I asked my significant other to call the alarm company and set up whatever needs to be set up...

Long story short, after he told me that he did it I gave him my opinion about the situation and I think I hurt his feelings, which was NOT what I was trying to do. I was just telling him what I thought and how I felt...

Now I wouldn't say that I'm an ineffective communicator. I just think I'm misunderstood. And sometimes I don't say what I REALLY REALLY want to say, mainly because I don't like to argue. I think my BF likes to start arguments on purpose though, so we can have makeup sex. BUT that's a story for another time...hehehe.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Mommy Dearest

Mothers...

A mom is always supposed to be there with a helping hand, a kind word, and a shoulder to cry on...right???

I've always been a 'MAMAS BOY'. Ever since I was little I wanted to be under my mother. Maybe it's because I'm the oldest...or maybe it's because I'm her only son. But I've always felt a deep connection with my mother and I love her very much. Unfortunately our relationship seems to be changing. It feels like I'm losing her. I'm sure it has a lot to do with my lifestyle. It's something that she can't handle, and honestly if I could turn back the hands of time I would take back the day that she found out. I wish she didn't know, but that's something that I can't change and I have to deal with it.

But it's hard. The person I love the most in this world seems to be distancing herself from me...or maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm finally growing up and realizing that I don't need her as much as I did when I was a little boy...but a man always needs his mother, no matter how old he gets. Oh well...

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

National Enquirer

I'm not a FUCKIN celebrity. So I don't understand why my name is ALWAYS in someone else's mouth. It's like people get some kind of pleasure out of talking about me, what I'm doing, who they THINK I'm fuckin, etc. It's always nice to have haters (ugh I hate that word) because it lets you know that you are doing something right. It lets you know that somebody is so desperate for attention that they are trying to bring you down so they can feel good about who they are as a person. So it's a self esteem issue. Haters (there's that word again) have poor self esteem.

So I'm going to declare the rest of July "Hater Appreciation Month". OK really...I need to get rid of that word. Hmmm...another word for hater...uhhh bopper? No I don't like that either. Dick monkey? No that's rude...Uhhh Paparazzi??? Yeah...I likes that. Paparazzi because they are always in your DAMN business.

Yes, you should appreciate all of the things that these desperate people do. So the next time you see a hater...oops I mean Paparazzi talking SHIT, don't get mad. Resist the urge to slap the dog PISS out of them. Instead, give them a nice smile and say THANK YOU because it will make them feel better. It will give their low self esteem a much needed boost. It might prevent them from committing suicide and you can feel good because you know that you saved a LIFE. Even if its the life of a worthless hater (again with that damn word).

Now keep in mind I said that JULY is Paparazzi Appreciation Month...after that you can tell a bitch to suck a big fat sick DICK and FUCK OFF!

FBI

OK I'm not gonna lie to yall...I'm guilty of the actions that I'm about to rant about. (But I only did it ONCE)

So everybody has a cell phone these days (trust me, I work for a cell phone company). Our cell phones contain our lives...they have our pictures, Facebook/Myspace/Twitter accounts, videos, texts, emails, etc. Everything about us is in our phone.

So when you are in a relationship is it ok to go through your boyfriend/girlfriends phone? Is it ok to read their texts or view their pictures? Is it ok to go through their Myspace and Facebook messages? Some would say yes, and others would say no. Some say that you have every right to know what's going on in your relationship. They say that you have the right to know who's talking to your boyfriend, or texting him, or sending him pictures. Others say that everyone has a right to privacy and by viewing the contents of their phone you are BLATANTLY disrespecting that right.

So what causes the temptation to go through someones phone? Generally people do this because they think something is going on...they think their boyfriend or girlfriend is cheating on them.

If you think your boyfriend or girlfriend is CHEATING on you, then you should confront the situation instead of trying to play the role of a private investigator because you will most likely get hurt. It's very tempting to go through your mates phone, especially when it's ringing all day long. You want to see what's going on. Trust me, I understand. You want to know if your boyfriend or girlfriend is being faithful.

We all have the right to know if the person we love is being faithful to us, but the best way to find out is to COMMUNICATE with that person and observe their behavior. Trust me, what's done in the dark ALWAYS comes to light.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

My Name is like DICK

Ummmm so this morning I had a photo shoot in the downtown warehouse district (I'm a photographer). It JUST SO HAPPENS that I was waiting for my model to arrive in a parking lot across the street from one of Houston's popular "Alternative" nightclubs. Someone drove by and saw me waiting and sent a text message to my significant other. I think it said something like "Why is your boyfriend waiting in the parking lot of this club? What is he doing?"

SO I have a problem...why the FUCK is this nosy ass person concerned about where I am and what I'm doing? And if it's that big of a deal, why the FUCK didn't this nosy ass person stop and ask me for himself instead of being messy? I came to the following conclusion:

This person wants what he can't have and will do whatever it takes to get it. It's a classic case of "I Wanna Steal Your Man". It's cute actually...kinda flattering. I'm glad I crossed his mind. I'm happy that he thought enough about me and my significant other to send a text message regarding my whereabouts. Apparently my name is like a dick...everyone wants it in their mouth.

So there's really no moral to this story...everybody follow me on twitter!
http://www.twitter.com/sc8709

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Selling Dreams

So I looked up the definition of the word HOE in the dictionary (dictionary.com actually) and this is what it said:

a long-handled implement having a thin, flat blade usually set transversely, used to break up the surface of the ground, destroy weeds, etc

Clearly that wasn't the definition that I was looking for. SO I looked up WHORE, thinking that would give me what I need. And this is what it said:

a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

I wouldn't consider myself a hoe. I'm not a garden tool and I'm not a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse. I am very flirtatious however. Maybe a little too flirtatious for a man that's in a healthy and committed relationship. I don't find anything wrong with flirting. My BF could flirt with anyone that he wants to (and I'm sure he does) and I wouldn't get upset because I know who he comes home to. Flirting generally means nothing. People like attention and flirting is a way of getting it. Of course if your mate is giving you all of the attention that you need then you don't need to flirt with anyone, correct? Maybe...maybe not. I flirt because I like attention and I like how it feels to know that you want me but you can't have me. Selfish, isn't it? But I'm a selfish guy...I like to have my cake and eat it too...but that's a story for another time.

The bottom line is this: I'm a man. Men have wandering eyes and there's nothing you can do about it. I flirt every now and then. Of course I'm not bold enough to do it with my BF around. That would be rude...but I do it. And it's innocent flirting. I don't go around saying shit like "Say pa, you look good. When you gon let me fuck?" No, nothing like that...but if you are cute I will let you know. And after that I'll let you know that I'm in a healthy and committed relationship.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Introduction

Hi...my name is Steven and I like dick. I know that's a strange way to introduce myself but I figured we might as well get that out of the way so there's no confusion. And let me clarify my statement...the phrase "I Like Dick" is a loose expression. I say that because I like dick and ass equally...I'm fully versatile. But that's a conversation for another night. And I'm in a healthy and committed relationship, so if you approach me the wrong way your feelings will get hurt. Hmm...what else do you people need to know about me? I'm 22 years old, a recent graduate of a historic and prestigious Texas HBCU (Prairie View A&M), and a future homeowner (8/4/09). I work for the nations 3rd largest mobile communications provider (Sprint) and I hate every minute of it. The only reason I'm still there is because I can't quit until my new house is built...but as soon as that house is finished BAAAYYBAAAAYYYYYY I'm chunkin deuce! I want to be a teacher (even though my degree is in Finance) so I can help my community and be a role model to kids that need one. I have one biological sister, two play sisters, a play brother, and several "in-laws". Most of my family knows about me...except for the aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. But my mom and pop know and they deal with it. My sister knows and she doesn't care...she loves me either way.

Sooo enough about me...I decided to start a blog because I keep a lotta shyt bottled up, and that's not healthy according to people like Oprah and Dr. Phil. So I'm using this as an outlet to express my FEELINGS. Yup...doesn't get any gayer than that...kidding. And I'm goofy as hell so expect some crazy shit at 2am, like this. I don't mind meeting people and making friends...and I LOVE to travel. So far I've been to L.A., New Orleans, and ATL (my favorite). I've lived in several other places since I'm a military brat (Germany, Colorado, Missouri, Georgia). Currently I call the lovely city of HOUSTON, TEXAS home. I guess its an ok city. It's the fourth largest city in the country so it must be special. If it wasn't, then the 5.4 million people that live here would live somewhere else. It's a hick town though...and there are a lot of Mexicans. Mexicans that refuse to learn English. I mean I don't mind learning Spanish but DAMN! And it's hot as hell...actually I think it's hotter than hell. Much hotter and more humid. But we have a/c so it's not that bad. And BEYONCE is from here...and so is George Foreman. And NASA is HQd here.

Well uhh, I guess that's enough for now. It's 2am and I NEED to be sleep. Until next time...

DEUCES